I am a Taekwondo instructor and spend a lot of my time
working with small children just learning the sport. While they tend to
have overflowing enthusiasm for the sport, many also tend to second guess
themselves when learning a new skill.
I was working with 5 younger boys practicing their first
form in class recently. One of the boys was higher in rank than the
others, as he has attended class for about a year and a half on a very regular
basis. I always remind him that he is my "expert" that the
others can look up to and follow. I'll call him "Bruce". The others
were very enthusiastic new white belts. Bruce and the other 4 boys all
know Unit 1, just some better than others.
Bruce is the expert of this group at Unit 1. He learned it more than a year and a half ago
and has performed and tested on his mastery of it many times.
Taekwondo forms are a sequenced series of moves that follow
a pattern and look the same every time, no matter who does them. They
help provide the foundation for a lot of other training we do.
Part way through Unit 1 Bruce was doing a great job.
He had completed each of the moves correctly and without hesitation.
Half way through the form things fell apart. All 4 of the other boys got lost in the form.
At one point, they were all facing different directions and doing
different moves.
Although none of the 5 were in the same place, only Bruce
was in the correct position and doing the form correctly. The problem was
that Bruce started watching the others.
He not only became distracted, he started to second guess himself.
He tried to correct himself based on what one of the other students was
doing. When he realized this was wrong,
he tried to copy another one of the boys. He went through this same
process until he had copied the wrong moves of all 4 of the others, becoming
more and more frustrated through the remainder of Unit 1.
I took the time after we were done to visit with Bruce about
what happened and point out that he in fact was the only student doing the form
correctly...until he started second guessing himself. His response wasn't
"thank you" or "I knew I was right". It was "but the others were ALL doing
something different". He simply
couldn't wrap his head around the idea that he should have confidently
continued doing what he knew was right even though no one else was doing the
same.
I believe this happens to all of us at some point, no matter
how young or old we are.
Some important takeaways/real-life application:
- Be your own expert and follow your heart confidently when
doing what YOU know is right.
- Don't let others who don't understand distract you.
- Don't let those others make you second guess yourself.
You owe this level of respect to yourself.
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